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Tiny Gun Creates Weapon of Mass Destruction

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April 8, 2006

nuclear bomb explosion

A while ago, in a BBC documentary about penis obsession, I witnessed a man who paid $12 000 US to add a maximum of three-quarters of an inch to the length and a similarly small increment to the width of his statistically average penis so it would be just slightly above average. The operation and the stretching apparatus that had to be worn a minimum of 8 hours a day for 3 months required a serious commitment for minimal results. I couldn't imagine what it would be like, if you did all that and didn't achieve the full possible benefits.

Here's what can happen, I guess. John Shiffman (I accidentally wrote Stiff man the first time of course) writer for The Philadelphia Inquirer (04/05/06), explains that Brett R. Steidler, a 25-year-old factory worker from a devout Christian family in Reamstown, Lancaster County located a cosmetic surgeon online in Chicago.

After travelling to Illinois, he paid the doctor $8 000 US to enlarge his organ but after considerable complications after the surgery he was "extremely unhappy with the results," as described by Assistant US Attorney, Jennifer Arbittier Williams in her court filing.

Steidler sent his doctor a letter bomb constructed out of black gunpowder, a carbon dioxide cartridge, a nine-volt battery, a model-rocket igniter and dental floss, disguised in a envelope marked with a church's return address that he sent from North Bloomfield, Ohio a across stateline several hours from his home.

A letter bomb could typically earn someone two years in prison but Federal Prosecutors are charging Steidler under a federal statute - 18 U.S.C. Section 2332a(a)(2) - that qualifies the device he attempted to mail as a "weapon of mass destruction" and carries a maximum penalty of life in prison.

The young man did have second thoughts and alerted authorities shortly after he'd mailed the explosive so no one was hurt in the end.

His defense attorney is arguing that his client is mentally ill, possibly even bipolar.

No word on whether Bush plans to attack Pennsylvania after hearing the news about officials finally finding proof of a WMD.

Posted by Will Peters at April 8, 2006 4:45 AM

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lmfao

Posted by: awesome at May 10, 2006 6:19 PM

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