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December 17, 2005

How to have sex with all the relatives around

Every year I travel home for Christmas and generally at some point during those few days when the partying has stopped and there are no nieces and nephews hanging off of you and everyone has gone to bed, there comes a time when you want to have sex. Having sex under my parents roof has always caused me some anxiety, after all do I really want them hearing what I do in bed?

Especially after having had a few drinks, sex can become a rather noisy business, so I was happy to come across an article on About.com that gives you tips on how to have sex when you are a guest in your parents home. The article describes a lot of solid and common sense tricks, but I suppose I was a bit surprised that the author didn't come up with some more intriguing ways to make sex silent enough to be respectful and exciting enough to have a good time.

One of Cory Silverberg's suggestions is to turn on the radio so that it muffles the sounds of moaning. Well, my theory is why not add a ball and gag to the whole scenario, especially for the partner that can't seem to be quiet because it's not exactly his or her parent's home.

Another suggestion is using the forbidden fantasy element. By this he means using the fact that you weren't allowed to have sex at home as a chance to kink up the night. My theory is why bother with the imagination when you could go to the car, warm it up and have a quickie like the good old days when there was no where else to have sex.

Silverberg's article is a good and common sense read, but who knows, maybe it will generate as many dirty ideas for you as it has for me.

Posted by sloth at December 17, 2005 1:21 AM

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