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April 13, 2011

Green Sex


Earlier this week someone told me that April was Green Sex Toy Month. Right away I had a few thoughts about what that might entail. My first idea was painting my vibrator green. (Yes, I have a vibrator. It is a great thing to have when you have a lady over. Every guy should have one. Trust me! Your woman will be "very grateful," if you know what I mean.)

The next thought that passed through my head was the idea of chicks masturbating with plants. But that doesn't seem pleasant, does it ladies? Finally I had the obvious image of the Hulk having sex. For all you women who like your sex a little rough and your men a little aggressive in the bedroom, I think this is one time where you would like him when he's angry.

After my random thought session about Green Sex Toy Month I thought nothing more about it until a few days later when I came across the Ecotypic bed. What is that, you ask? Well, simply put, it is a bed that generates energy and power from movement on it.

The bed has speakers built into the posts, there are overhead LED reading lights and there is even an LED flower box that grows greenery up and over the bed posts. And all this is powered by a built-in battery that turns in-bed movement into energy.

I have to say that it sounded really good to me. And then I saw a picture of it and it looked even better. With the modern curves and design and the greenery covering the posts, the bed looks like it is from some kind of futuristic Garden of Eden.

So what kind of movements are we talking about? Well, it seems like pretty much anything. I have been known to move a lot when I sleep, so I'm sure that will get some charging going. There are also build-in rings and pulleys that you can use to do exercises with and generate even more power. What else could generate power? How about this:

Okay, I know you're all thinking it, so we should just say it: SEX! To me this would seem like the best kind of movement. Don't you agree? And it also sounds like a great way to get more sex. Let me explain...

Imagine your significant other is reading their book and the overhead lights in the bed start to go a little dim. You can always tell them that they should have sex with you in order to charge the lights so they can read again. Or, guys, let's say your woman loves the greenery that is slowly growing over the posts. Well, what could you do to make it grow faster? Hmm, let me think about that (nudge, nudge, wink, wink).

Hey, and who knows, it might also get her doing things you always wanted to try. I mean, I'm sure a threesome with your girl and her hot best friend would generate more power and energy than that same old, once a week, one-on-one missionary action you've been stuck with since you hit the four-month mark in your relationship and she broke out the big pajamas and put away the sexy lingerie she wore on your third date.

At this point the bed appears to be just a concept, but it's one that has some legs behind it, so who knows what may come. All I know is that I want one almost as much as I want a threesome with my girl and her hot friend. I'll let you know if I get either of them.

Posted by A.K. Anderson at April 13, 2011 1:01 AM

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Comments

What woman would let you use a vibrator on her that was in some other chick?!? Who are you sleeping with?!

Posted by: Concerned at April 20, 2011 4:16 PM

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