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Acting the Ass - Sexy Double Action

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July 25, 2006

Anita Hart Celebrity Butt Double.jpg

I'm terribly bad at not working out. I know people addicted to the adrenaline rush of a good gym session but me, I don't believe no pain, no gain. I figure as long I'm still scoring some action occasionally, that my body's okay as long as it's getting laid. If it isn't broke, don't fix it!

Of course, that attitude means I go straight to pot unless I'm single and on the prowl. I'm not the only one. I had a friend who lost over 100 pounds through dieting and the gym five times a week. She was obsessed with exercise and my former binge-eating buddy started moaning any time unhealthy food even touched her lips.

Now she has a live-in lover, so her resolve has dissolved into complacency. All her preaching to me that diet and exercise are about feeling good, not looking good, seems somewhat suspect.

Nevertheless, I'm getting older and my face is my fortune, that's why I'm totally broke (and alone, possibly). Nevertheless, I have found a surprisingly affordable solution, hiring a body double.

Daniel Engber aka The Explainer on Slate (07/24/06) says the going rate in Hollywood for a full-body double is $795 for an 8-hour shift or about $445.30 for parts models. Someone such as top butt double Anita Hart pictured above whose rear end has stood in for celebrities such as Liz Hurley and even model Cindy Crawford charge premium rates. Moreover, any nudity could let a stand-in demand double pay, as would any dangerous stunts.

In my case, my double will do nudity but safe sex only so low hazard pay. Trickier is trying to insert myself into the scene at the crucial juncture. Getting my double to turn the lights off, blindfolding our costar and my slipping in from behind should have seamlessly transition fabulous double to my slightly flabby self.

With a gym membership only costing about $200 for six months, I might not save much money by hiring a double, but when I don't call a one nightstand the next day - my double will seem the jerk... Maybe, he does deserve higher hazard pay?!

Posted by Will Peters at July 25, 2006 10:54 AM

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