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July 31, 2012

Metaphorical Handguns for Women

Metaphorical Handguns for Women
Image courtesy of Party Hardcore.

I've been watching my local shopping channel almost religiously lately. That's because some retired, amateur porn model I had a major crush on back in the day is now one of the hosts. It's so weird to see her in a non-porn setting, but that's not nearly as weird as some of the products she has to plug. For example, handguns for women. They're just like regular guns, except painted pink with white bunnies, peace symbols and daisies on them. I remember when this chick used to Party Hardcore on a bunch of sites that frequently featured porn for women. She was cocking a very different kind of handgun back then, if you catch my drift.

Continue reading Metaphorical Handguns for Women

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 30, 2012

Going to the Big Tit Movies

Going to the Big Tit Movies
Image courtesy of Sarennas World.

It's summertime! Time to go to theaters and check out some blockbuster movies! Then, take your date home and check out some big tit movies together. At least, that's what I'm planning to do. Hopefully, the date in question with have a set of huge hooters like Tawny Peaks does. I'm also hoping that she'll let me play with those huge tits of hers. If not, there are plenty of other blockbuster and big-boobs movies to see.

Continue reading Going to the Big Tit Movies

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 29, 2012

Squirting Teens Are Hot

Squirting Teens Are Hot
Image courtesy of Squirt Coach.

My friend says he's torn between two squirting teens that he's dating. He really loves the sight of a squirting pussy, so simply can't decide which one he wants to break things off with and which one he wants to try going steady with. Personality is important to him too, of course, but he says the one he likes on a personal level is in serious need of a Squirt Coach. My suggestion is that he simply volunteers to teach her how to gush as much as the other chick and that way he'll get the best of both worlds.

Continue reading Squirting Teens Are Hot

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 28, 2012

Amazing Blowjob Leaves Smile on His Face and Cum On Hers

Amazing Blowjob Leaves Smile on His Face and Cum On Hers
Image courtesy of Throated.

I've been checking out some blowjob porn sites lately. I guess you could say I was feeling nostalgic, since I recently met someone who likes to give me head all the time (I don't see the relationship going far, but I can't quite seem to get myself to break it off for some reason). She loves a good Deepthroat Frenzy now and then, so almost every session has me on the receiving end of an amazing blowjob.

Continue reading Amazing Blowjob Leaves Smile on His Face and Cum On Hers

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 27, 2012

I Dream Of Dina

I Dream Of Dina
Image courtesy of Tainster.

I think I'm finally getting to the point where I'm spending too much time on the mega porn site known as Tainster. I've had the network's girls on my mind almost every waking hour for the last few weeks, but now I've even got the beauties on my mind while I sleep. Just last night I had a freaky dream about a babe named Dina. I first saw her on a site called Slime Wave and my dream was a lot like the scenes that are featured there.

Continue reading I Dream Of Dina

Posted by Chris Parker at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 26, 2012

Don't Forget to Put Sunscreen on a Hot Girls Ass

Don't Forget to Put Sunscreen on a Hot Girls Ass
Image courtesy of Ass Parade.

Now that it's summer, you'll want to take extra protection of your skin. Load up vitamins C and E if you know you're going to be out in the sun all day, and make sure to apply healthy amounts of tanning lotion. Swimsuit weather means there are going to be plenty of hot babes in thongs, so be generous and offer to rub some of that sunscreen all over a girls ass, especially if she's hot. A bunch of butt porn sites imply that not only will she let you, but also she'll thank you by having sex with you. Who wouldn't want a Big Ass Adventure like that in the summertime?

Continue reading Don't Forget to Put Sunscreen on a Hot Girls Ass

Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 25, 2012

Another Reason Why The Muppets Are Better Than Mike Huckabee

The Muppets Are Better Than Mike Huckabee
Image courtesy of GlobalNews.ca.

Before we get to Mike Huckabee and The Muppets we need to go back to last week when Chick-fil-A President Dan Cathy made comments about how he and his company support "the traditional family."

Continue reading Another Reason Why The Muppets Are Better Than Mike Huckabee

Posted by A.K. Anderson at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 24, 2012

They're Not Stupid, They're Just Amateur Boobs

They're Not Stupid, They're Just Amateur Boobs
Image courtesy of ATK Premium.

My director friend once exclaimed that he hated the amateur boobs appearing in front of his cameras. Probably due to the fact that I work in the porn industry, I immediately assumed he was talking about some amateur wives with nasty-looking tits. This made for a bit of an awkward conversation until I realized he was talking about a trio of talentless hacks who made up half of his main cast. Apparently, despite the three of them demanding the most money, they were all acting as if this were their First Time Filmed. The fact that they all had ugly boobies was purely coincidence. Kidding!

Continue reading They're Not Stupid, They're Just Amateur Boobs

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 23, 2012

My Favorite American Reality Television Series Needs More Nudity

My Favorite American Reality Television Series Needs More Nudity
Image courtesy of Totally Undressed.

I'm not as big into the American reality television series fad as I used to be. These days, I'm down to only two: The Biggest Loser and Survivor. Maybe Americans are prudes or maybe the censors are just behind the times, but there isn't any nudity in either of them! Sometimes, a challenge will involve nipple slips and the like (in rare instances, you'll even catch a contestant Totally Undressed!), but these are the only cases in which you see them naked - and the blur out the naughty bits on top of that! Thank goodness I write reality porn reviews for a living, or else I wouldn't see any sex or boobs in any reality video setting!

Continue reading My Favorite American Reality Television Series Needs More Nudity

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 22, 2012

A Mega Cock Amount of Smut

A Mega Cock Amount of Smut
Image courtesy of Pack Of Porn.

I recently read that people have started using the words "cock amount" as a slang term to mean "a crazy amount" on account of how it sounds similar to the word "cockamamie." You know, like how a ton of people say "a fuckload" as synonymous with "a ton" because it sounds like "a truck load." I don't know if it'll catch on, but I think it would be funny to see if my future reviews end up having word strings like "mega cock amount" when discussing a porn pass. It would be especially funny if the Mega Site Pass in question focused exclusively on huge dicks. For those wondering, I am indeed the type of person who loves the "orange you glad I didn't say "banana"?" joke. (Get it? Banana? Big penis? Ha!)

Continue reading A Mega Cock Amount of Smut

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 21, 2012

Isn't Arab Anal The Same As Doing It Greek?

 Isn't Arab Anal The Same As Doing It Greek?
Image courtesy of Gag N Gape.

Those who regularly read my blog probably noticed that I've got a handful of crass and overly descriptive friends. Their sexploits have even made the subject of some of my blogs. The other day, one of them was bragging about how he got himself some Arab anal. I've often heard of anal penetration being referred to as "doing it Greek," so I figured he meant that he got some Gag N Gape action with an Arab woman. Nope! Being Greek himself, it turns out he's trying to singlehandedly replace the term with another nationality. He likes the double As, but I can't help finding it odd that he's using the word "anal" in a term synonymous with, well, anal itself.

Continue reading Isn't Arab Anal The Same As Doing It Greek?

Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (1)

July 20, 2012

Czech Cutie Klarisa Leone

Czech Cutie Klarisa Leone
Image courtesy of Tainster.

The hottie featured here is Klarisa Leone. She's the latest babe to catch my eye and ever since I saw her take part in some hot group sex action on a website called Drunk Sex Orgy, I just haven't been able to get enough of her. Lucky for me, she appears on many of the websites that you get access to when you've got a membership to the mega porn site known as Tainster.

Continue reading Czech Cutie Klarisa Leone

Posted by Chris Parker at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 19, 2012

Pussy Spanking, OTK and Caning, Oh My!

Pussy Spanking, OTK and Caning, Oh My!
Image courtesy of Bad Females.

Whenever someone I'm dating asks for a pussy spanking, I get a little apprehensive. Having been told that the area is about as sensitive as a cock, I'm always afraid I'll spank the muff too hard. Then I realize that these Bad Females are asking me to smack their lady parts because they want that pain, so I go to town on their pussies anyway. Also, for good measure, I then flip them over and give their rears a spanking.

Continue reading Pussy Spanking, OTK and Caning, Oh My!

Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 18, 2012

Who Says Non Nude Pics Aren't Hot?

Who Says Non Nude Pics Aren't Hot?
Image courtesy of Heidis Candy.

I've been debating whether or not I should try online dating again. When I told this to an ex of mine, she told me to put at least one pic in my profile that showed me in nothing but a bathing suit. Her opinion is that non nude pics are boring, whereas shots with nothing but a dick in them are too crass. I agree with the latter statement, but clearly my ex hasn't been to any nn porn sites lately. The babes on those kinds of sites know that sexual attraction is caused by more than just a flash of nipple. If you want to see what I mean, then you should take a look at Heidis Candy.

Continue reading Who Says Non Nude Pics Aren't Hot?

Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 17, 2012

Perky Asians with Perky Titties

Perky Asians with Perky Titties
Image courtesy of All Gravure.

Some say that perky Asians make for the best lovers. I don't know if that's necessarily true, but I can confirm from experience that they're definitely among the more amazing lovers I've ever had. That always seems to go double for whenever the perky babe has a pair of perky boobs for me to play with. Admittedly, I'm kind of biased, because as much as I love Asian pussy, I really, really love Asian titties. I blame porn sites like All Gravure for my bias.

Continue reading Perky Asians with Perky Titties

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 16, 2012

I Like Sunsets and Long Walks along the Voyeur Beach

I Like Sunsets and Long Walks along the Voyeur Beach
Image courtesy of Beach Hunters.

I heard that there's a voyeur beach not far from me. I had heard about the nude beach in the area before, but this was my first time hearing it referred to as a voyeur one. What exactly does that even mean? Is it known for having a voyeur spy or two or three who hide behind sand castles watching topless chicks putting on sunscreen or something? Are these Beach Hunters actually watching exhibitionists who have sex near the waves? I have a sinking sensation that many of you want to know the answers to these questions, so I promise to check out this nude beach myself on the weekend (the fact that it'll be swarming with naked chicks is just a bonus to me).

Continue reading I Like Sunsets and Long Walks along the Voyeur Beach

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 15, 2012

These Chicks Are Advanced Masturbation Practitioners

These Chicks Are Advanced Masturbation Practitioners
Image courtesy of Cuties Galore.

I like to think I've mastered all the different ways in which one can get himself off with. In fact, I'm even fairly confident in my ability to get women off through petting practices, too. Things like dildo porn always remind me of how much of an amateur I am, though. That's because there are Cuties Galore who prove time and time again that all they need is some quality alone time with their favorite toys (or even just their hands) and they can fuck themselves better than any partner could ever dream to. That's because they use some of the more advanced masturbation tricks.

Continue reading These Chicks Are Advanced Masturbation Practitioners

Posted by Adam Strong at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 14, 2012

Paula and Other Dirty Girls

Paula and Other Dirty Girls
Image courtesy of Tainster.

Like I keep telling you, I'm spending a lot of time on the mega porn site known as Tainster these days. I love the network's dirty girls and I seem to discover a new one every time I check out some vids and pics. Paula is the name of the most recent babe to catch my eye and she's also the cutie you see pictured here. I first took notice of her on a site called Slime Wave, but she appears elsewhere, too.

Continue reading Paula and Other Dirty Girls

Posted by Chris Parker at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 13, 2012

Crystalis: One of the Czech Republic's Hottest Female Porn Stars

Crystalis: One of the Czech Republic's Hottest Female Porn Stars
Image courtesy of Tainster.

I've spent weeks exploring the mega porn site known as Tainster and I'm still enjoying it as much today as I was when I first landed on it. The fact that the network's allowing me to keep discovering new female porn stars is certainly helping to maintain my interest. The latest girl to catch my eye is a model by the name of Crystalis. I first took notice of her on a website called Mad Sex Party, but she appears on a number of other sites as well.

Continue reading Crystalis: One of the Czech Republic's Hottest Female Porn Stars

Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 12, 2012

Want a Sexless Marriage With a Barista? It will only cost you $25,000.

Barista Bride And Group
Image courtesy of Michelle Manetti via The Local: Fort Greene/Clinton Hill on Flickr.

Are you tired of being single? Have you been out there on the dating scene trying to find someone to marry and settle down with? Are you hoping to never see that person naked? Do you have $25,000 burning a hole in your pocket? Well, then call me Monty Hall 'cause have I got a deal for you!

Continue reading Want a Sexless Marriage With a Barista? It will only cost you $25,000.

Posted by A.K. Anderson at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 11, 2012

Why Won't These X-Ray Specs See Through Lingerie?

Why Won't These X-Ray Specs See Through Lingerie?
Image courtesy of E Pantyhose Land.

I just took a short "staycation" the other week and, like most people who do so in order to save money, I ended up wasting tons of cash on stupid stuff anyway. Some of the junk I purchased includes a DVD box set that I will likely never get around to watching, a back scratcher and X-ray specs. Unsurprisingly, the back scratcher is more like an upper shoulder scratcher, while the X-ray specs completely failed to see through lingerie, let alone multiple layers of clothing. I guess if I want to be able to see through undergarments, I'll just have to stare at chicks in shiny pantyhose again. You know, like the babes on E Pantyhose Land.

Continue reading Why Won't These X-Ray Specs See Through Lingerie?

Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 10, 2012

Good Sites for XXX Vids

Good Sites for XXX Vids
Image courtesy of DVD Box.

There are a lot of porn tastes out there and I think I've seen just about all of them. And sometimes you just don't know what you're in the mood for, so it can be really helpful to be a member to a big movie porn site that gives you a lot of choice. This is where you take a moment and thank your lucky stars that you have me and that I can give you some info one three of them to help narrow down your choice on which to join. I accept cash and money orders, so if you want to thank me financially, please do so. Let's talk about the XXX vids on Adult Rental.

Continue reading Good Sites for XXX Vids

Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 9, 2012

Mona Lee Is A Cute Brunette

Mona Lee Is A Cute Brunette
Image courtesy of Tainster.

The cute brunette that you see featured here is a lovely lady by the name of Mona Lee. Just like all the other hotties I've been telling you about as of late, she's a model that you can see in action on the mega porn site known as Tainster. I first took note of her on a website called Fully Clothed Sex, but she appears on a number of other sites as well.

Continue reading Mona Lee Is A Cute Brunette

Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 8, 2012

Pornstar Gals Are a Special Breed

Pornstar Gals Are a Special Breed
Image courtesy of DigitalPlayground.

What would life be like if there were no pornstar gals? Well, we'd probably have no porn. Okay, maybe that's not true. We'd have the same amount of porn, but it would all be done by ugly people or amateurs. Hey, someone around here has to be honest. Do you want to see uggos fuck? Then thank your lucky stars for those raunchy and brave men and women who are committed to sucking and screwing for your viewing pleasure. Actually, let's just get on with the sites I'm here to talk about. The more I talk about there being no pornstars, the more my libido suffers. Let's dive into Strictly Pornstars.

Continue reading Pornstar Gals Are a Special Breed

Posted by April Scott at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 6, 2012

Jessie Hazz Casts a Sexy Spell with Her Hitachi Magic Wand

Jessie Hazz Casts a Sexy Spell with Her Hitachi Magic Wand
Image courtesy of Tainster.

I'm still having a blast with the Tainster network and its models continue to impress me. The latest one to catch my eye is Jessie Hazz. She's a blonde beauty and I caught my first glimpse of her while I was visiting a website called Orgasmatics. It's mostly a lesbian site, but if you look around enough, you will see some hardcore fucking. One thing you won't have to look hard for, though, are scenes in which a girl uses a Hitachi Magic Wand on another babe.

Continue reading Jessie Hazz Casts a Sexy Spell with Her Hitachi Magic Wand

Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 5, 2012

Let That Monster Dick Out!

Let That Monster Dick Out
Image courtesy of Lex Steele.

That's probably what most of those chicks on these sites are saying. They want that massive man muscle to penetrate their tight holes and hump that orifice until it contracts in complete orgasmic pleasure and send tiny shivers right from the roots of their hair to their toes. You like that description? I'm feeling particularly rude and raunchy this morning. Ok, that was more Harlequin novel than horny fuck-talk, but hey, I still have three paragraphs to fill out. Speaking of filling, that's exactly what each monster dick does to the beauties on these porn sites. I love monster cock porn. The babes are perpetually in shock at the size of the peen and some of the scenes make me cross my legs slightly and maybe even elicit a wince or two. Want to see what I mean? Let's check in on Mr. Lex Steele.

Continue reading Let That Monster Dick Out!

Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

July 2, 2012

These Dudes Want a Mature Fuck

These Dudes Want a Mature Fuck
Image courtesy of USA Mature.

I'm afraid of getting old. I just recently got into my thirties and with every passing day I feel like I'm watching sand slip the hourglass of my life. Wow, depressed yet? I can't really pinpoint the exact thing that makes me afraid. I don't think it's death itself, but watching yourself age and looking around at all the younger women with their supple bodies and brilliant sex lives. This was how I felt, but after watching the babes on Mature Gloryhole, I'm all of a sudden not so glum. The horny older women here are still hot to trot and they're hornier as the ever as they get with a guy for a mature fuck.

Continue reading These Dudes Want a Mature Fuck

Posted by April Scott at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)

July 1, 2012

Maybe It's Time for Live Sex Cams

Maybe It's Time for Live Sex Cams
Image courtesy of Naked.

I suppose some of you are thinking, "Hey, it's ALWAYS time for live sex cams!" but that's not really what I mean. I mean maybe it's time to turn to performing on live cams to make some extra cash. Yes, I make an okay living, but as my mother always tells me, I have "champagne tastes and beer pockets." Let's face it, that Diane Von Furstenburg vintage wrap dress and those Louboutin studded heels are not going to walk up into my closet on their own. After watching some live porn shows, I often wonder if I could do them. I mean, you don't have to do it with anyone there and you pretty much you can do only what you want. Maybe I can take a page from the books of the girls that appear on Naked.

Continue reading Maybe It's Time for Live Sex Cams

Posted by April Scott at 6:30 AM| Comments (0)