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October 29, 2010

And The Porn Poem Contest Winner Is...

And The Porn Poem Contest Winner Is
Image courtesy of All Porn Comics.

We've come to the final porn poem post where we announce the winner and, of course, the champion is none other than Chris Parker! Creative, dashing and smooth, not only can he leap tall buildings in a single bound and win every contest, but he also has the biggest...er...comic collection in the office. Actually, he could probably give All Porn Comics a run for its money in more ways than one. For those of you who don't know the song that this poem goes with, I highly recommend finding it online in order to fully appreciate this entry. Chris has once again proven that he is a god of the written word and the rest of us are lowly hacks who don't deserve to be in his presence. And for his troubles, he gets to use the glory hole first. Congrats! Be a dear and tell Chris how much you like it by leaving a comment on his profile page.

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 28, 2010

Another Porn Poem Contest Runner-Up

Another Porn Poem Contest Runner-Up
Image courtesy of We Are Hairy.

Ladies, hold on to your panties, because A.K. Anderson is in the house. Okay, he's not really (because he told me that he refused to step foot in this house since I pantsed him during the office Christmas party) but his lyrical stylings are. If we can learn anything from Mr. A's words, we know that incidental poop is okay and he has a thing for hairy pussies, (images from We Are Hairy are burned into his computer monitor) trannies and Dove soap. There's A.K in a nutshell for you, such a complicated individual. Mothers, lock up your sons because it's time to read the musings from this twisted writer's mind. Like it? Leave a comment on his profile page.

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 27, 2010

The New Porn Writer On The Block

The New Porn Writer On The Block
Image courtesy of Orgy Sex Parties.

You may know Will, Chris, Wayne and A.K. intimately, but we have a fresh face for you today. He goes by the name Brian and he has yet to take the plunge into the Rabbit hole, but we're all applying the proper peer pressure, so hopefully he steps up to bat in the very near future. We love having fresh minds to fill with kink and after reading his poem, you're sure to agree that his porn progress is coming along nicely. As you can see from his words below, we already have him obsessed with tits, anal and Orgy Sex Parties. Not bad for his first year here.

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 26, 2010

An Ode To Blowing A Load

An Ode To Blowing A Load
Image courtesy of Sperm Glazed.

For those of you who have been chomping at the bit to read more of our porn poems, your wait is over. Here's another piece of literary magic from our own Wayne King. Not only is he punny (Wayne King...say it fast!), but he knows how to turn a phrase and we love to read about his effusive love for blowing his spunky load all over women. Actually, if you like to do the same thing, you will probably appreciate the action on Sperm Glazed just like he does. Two peas in a pod you two are! Like his entry? Let Wayne know on his comments page, or maybe the two of you can just discuss your mutual love for giving cum baths... whatever.

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 25, 2010

A Raunchy Facial Cum Shot

A Raunchy Facial Cum Shot
Image courtesy of Facial Fest.

I'll give you three guesses as to what I'll be doing on Saturday night. That's right! I get to give my new neighbor a facial cum shot! Imagine my surprise when I got home after work to hear she just broke up with her boyfriend and wanted some rebound sex from me that ended with her taking a gooey load. Doesn't that just sound like a premise from a cum porn movie? I certainly thought so, so I figured I'd do some research as to how to give the babe her money's worth by taking notes from Cum In The Face.

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Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 22, 2010

Hot Porn Videos To Make You Cum Hard


Movie courtesy of Premium HD Videos.

I don't think I can stress just how great XXX movies are. I mean, I know I'm preaching to the converted, but the one thing that's great about reviewing porn is the fact that you get to be the first to know about new porn sites and fresh fetishes. In plain words, I'm on the cutting edge of the adult industry! And since I'm so grateful for this position, I of course want to share the wealth and let you guys know the newest smut out there. First, let's talk about the raunch found on Premium HD Videos. Trust me, you get some great porn videos here!

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 21, 2010

Sweet And Sexy Ethnic Love

Sweet And Sexy Ethnic Love
Image courtesy of Czech Sex Club.

The other day I was on a date with my very white ex-girlfriend. I honestly don't know why. It's not like I was hoping for post-break up sex or anything, because I remember being in the mood for ethnic love at the time. So much so, that even hours prior to the dinner, I was in front of my laptop checking out Czech Sex Club. Can you blame me? I mean, how hot is ethnic porn, am I right?

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Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 20, 2010

Glamour Model Gives It Her All In The Nude

Glamour Model Gives It Her All In The Nude
Image courtesy of Domai.

I'm very big into the idea of sometimes taking a break from the world of hardcore porn. Sometimes when you one to admire a chick, you just don't want some strange dude's dick getting in the way of ogling her pussy. That's why I like site, like Domai. Today's story is about how a glamour model gives it her all in the nude.

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Posted by sloth at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 19, 2010

I Think I've Got Jungle Fever

I Think I've Got Jungle Fever
Image courtesy of Ebony Addiction.

I only get sick about once every 12 months and it seems that time of the year is upon me now, as I seem to have come down with a bad case of jungle fever. I don't know what it is, but I've been taking notice of black babes like never before over the last few days. It's been crazy! If this continues, I might just develop an Ebony Addiction and that'll be bad news for my girlfriend since she's a cute little white girl. Hopefully I can satisfy my newfound desire for black babes by checking out some ebony porn sites.

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Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 18, 2010

Bust Out The Big Tits Movies

Bust Out The Big Tits Movies
Image courtesy of Claudia Marie.

Melons, hooters, cans, knockers, fun bags, milk bags, tits, breasts, boobs...have I forgotten any? I'm sure I must have, but who cares because we're talking about massive honkers. Oh look, I got out one more. Today, we're celebrating big boobs and the babes who sport them in big tits movies. Is everybody paying attention? Good! Now, let's dive into Claudia Marie.

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 15, 2010

Nothing Hotter Than A Naked Cheerleader

Nothing Hotter Than A Naked Cheerleader
Image courtesy of Cheerleaders Hardcore.

The other day I was watching a football match when the pom pom brigade strutted their stuff onto the field. My ex-girlfriend always said that cheerleading wasn't a sport; it was just, in her own words, "softcore gymnastics sex." Well, if seeing these babes shout and jump around in their tight uniforms is considered softcore, then I want to see some hardcore cheerleader porn! That's why I visited Cheerleaders Hardcore. After all, if they look so good with their pom poms and miniskirts, just imagine how hot a naked cheerleader must be while bouncing up and down on a hard cock!

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Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 14, 2010

Three Cheers For Surprise Creampie

Three Cheers For Surprise Creampie
Image courtesy of Creampied Sweeties.

I just love filling my lovers' pussies to the brim with creampies. It's no secret. I've even been known to promise to pull out and instead give a surprise creampie or two (which didn't go over so well with the babes who are grossed out by cum in their muffs). There's just something about seeing chicks like those found on Creampied Sweeties that really gets me off.

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Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 13, 2010

See Your Favorite Celebrity Naked

I watched some awful European movies on the weekend and the only thing that could have redeemed them was some hardcore fucking. Sadly, there was no sex to be seen. In fact, there wasn't even so much as a nip slip. Given that I was watching some family films, the lack of celebrity pussy didn't shock me, but it did disappoint me all the same. Oh well, at least there are sites out there on which you can see your favorite celebrity naked whenever you want. Euro Movie Babes is one such website.

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Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 12, 2010

I Was A Hentai Monster

I Was A Hentai Monster
Image courtesy of Hentai Password.

Halloween is fast approaching and that means that it's time to pick out a costume for the big night. If you don't know what you want to dress up as and you're short on ideas, you might want to get some inspiration from a cartoon porn site or two. That's what I did a couple years back when I went out dressed as a hentai monster. My costume got me a ton of attention and some pussy as well, so you might want to get crackin' and give a website like Hentai Password a look.

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Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 11, 2010

Let's Go Enjoy The Best Blowjob Ever

Let's Go Enjoy The Best Blowjob Ever
Image courtesy of Drilled Mouths.

I hate to be the kind of guy who breaks up with a woman simply because she gives the worst head ever, but people like you and me deserve the best. Just once, I'd like my girlfriend's cock sucking skills to make me imitate the Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons and say "best blowjob ever!" But like I said, I don't want to break up with a chick just because her ability to give head is less than stellar, so I've been turning to the Internet in search of some better blowjob sex. Luckily for me, I stumbled upon Drilled Mouths.

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Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 8, 2010

Ivy Snow Knows How To Play Her Cards Right

Ivy Snow Knows How To Play Her Cards Right
Image courtesy of Ivy Snow.

Cute girls are a dime a dozen, so for a babe to really stand out she needs some personality. Ivy Snow knows how to have that adorable girl-next-door appeal, but with just that bit of an edge that makes her unique. She has a slightly alternative look with her tattoos and two-toned hair, but she exudes a sweetness that makes it hard not to smile every time you see her. Then again, she also exudes a sexiness that will move that smile down to your pants. We asked her a few questions...

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Posted by Will Peters at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 7, 2010

Anal Oral Sex Soliloquy


Movie courtesy of Dirty Ass 2 Mouth.

Recently, we had a contest in the writer's department where we had to write a poem about porn. We're going to post all of the entries, including the one that actually won. We'll start with the one written by yours truly, Will Peters and no, I don't really think that I'm Shakespeare reincarnated. Still, you can read the famous lines from Hamlet that inspired me and then enjoy my Anal Oral Sex Soliloquy. By the by, the answer to the quandary posed by my words is clear, you needn't choose between a butt or a blowjob with sites like Dirty Ass 2 Mouth.

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Posted by Will Peters at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 6, 2010

Hot Cheerleader Fucking Jocks At A Keg Party

Hot Cheerleader Fucking Jocks At A Keg Party
Image courtesy of College Party Time.

Coeds in sororities and frat brothas love to get their drink and their sex on at College Party Time. In today's story, you will read about a hot cheerleader fucking jocks at a keg party.

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Posted by Will Peters at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 5, 2010

Bizarre Porn Is The Answer To When Everything Tastes Vanilla

Bizarre Porn Is The Answer To When Everything Tastes Vanilla
Image courtesy of Its Real .

The other day I was watching Total Recall and started sporting a chubby when the chick with three tits flashed Schwarzenegger. Laugh all you want, but I know I'm not the only one after checking out some of the weird sex that's available on that World Wide Web of ours. For example, Its Real even stars a three-boobied beauty! So whenever my gal pal's two-tittied chest starts to taste a little vanilla, I hit the Net and check out some bizarre porn.

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Posted by Adam Strong at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 4, 2010

Pussy Sex: No Ifs, Ands or Butts

Pussy Sex: No Ifs, Ands or Butts
Image courtesy of Give Me Pink.

If there one thing sacred to a woman, it's her ladies. Many would love to know what goes in those conversations when the hot chicks get together with a few bottles of wine. Men, sex, shopping all get discussed of course. But what happens when a few single chicks get together? Men yes. Shopping yes, but the sex part is usually replaced by the sex toy. Hey, just because a babe doesn't have a real dick around doesn't mean she goes without the pussy sex! Neither do the gals on Give Me Pink.

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Posted by April Scott at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)

October 1, 2010

Nice Ass Pics Of Nice Asses

Nice Ass Pics Of Nice Asses
Image courtesy of Tushy Lickers.

If I could be serious for a moment, I'd like to remind you to never take anything or anyone for granted. I mention this because I used to have a girlfriend who would lick my nude ass almost as often as she'd suck my cock, but my current girlfriend won't park her tongue anywhere near brown town. As such, the only way I can enjoy anilingus these days is by visiting websites like Tushy Lickers.

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Posted by Chris Parker at 1:01 AM| Comments (0)